Setting the Space:

Setting the space can be very helpful, especially if you are going into a difficult place. I used to go to a lot of hard meetings as an advocate, many at the police department. I found it made a big difference to set the space. People would even comment about how different the room felt after, not knowing that I was setting the energy. You can set the space in advance by setting the space before you arrive, you can do it quickly in just a few moments when entering a room with your eyes open and no one will notice, or you can take your time, close your eyes and do it as a meditation. It is probably good to practice with the latter so you are able to quickly set the space as needed. Here is an outline.

* Ground, send a cord/root down to the centre and back up to the heavens. You can do this quickly- down, up, done.
* Then send a cord like a vine from your foot and crown to a corner of the room, then quickly ground the cord in the corner, down, up. Continue on to each corner, making a circle and sending out a cord & grounding it in each corner.
* Imagine a net. Pull the net through the room from ground up through the roof releasing into the sunlight which dissolves negative energy. You'll feel the weight as you do this. Pull the net through as many times as needed, 3 is not uncommon, it will feel lighter.
* Fill the room with a sparkling shower of present time, to set the place in present time without old stuff clogging it.
* Bring in whatever qualities you need/want, clarity, safety, kindness. 3 is not uncommon.
* You can continue & do the same for the building if you have time.

There is no need to break it down when you leave. More than one person can do this. It's sending your energy out to fill the room and claiming your place. It doesn't prevent others from having their place. It sets the energy with what you need, like opening a window if it's stuffy.


Drawing a Line:

Drawing a line is setting a boundary. The sword of discernment is a powerful tool in self-protection. It makes sense. You need to know what is and is not Ok for you and what's crossing the line for you. When I worked in violence against women we would help women decide a plan of action if they returned. How much is too much? They'd return with their partner promising to change, to get help, etc. It helped them to consider while they were still safe what they would do if / and often when their partner became violent again, and to figure out where the line was and what steps they could take to protect themself if that line was crossed, making plans to leave if things began to escalate before there was violence.

There are other subtle ways of setting up boundaries. My father was intense and difficult to be around. I wanted a relationship with him but found his intensity could wipe me out. I discovered if we added a distraction we could visit and have a relationship. I would set up our visits to play backgammon, go antique shopping, or go for a drive. Sometimes you just have to take people where they are. Not everyone has the capacity to negotiate or adapt to your requests. An even more subtle way is to imagine a flower between you to absorb the energy. This can be helpful when doing a psychic reading, but it is also helpful when dealing with someone without good boundaries, especially if they are distressed or agitated. It will help you be of assistance without absorbing frenetic energy. You just imagine a flower between you. That's it.

One of the skills needed to draw a line, is being able to discern what is you and what is not you. You need to be able to separate and be conscious of where you end or you can easily pick up other people's stuff & thinking it is yours, or give psychic readings / or therapy that are your projections.


Self-Forgiveness & Metas:

This is one of my favorite go to tools. Again, I figured it out as an advocate when I would feel slaughtered after the ugliness of meetings or politics. I would do self-forgiveness for myself and Metas for the person I was distressed with. It works and you can do it while you are doing the dishes or carrying on with your daily activities.

For Self-Forgiveness, forgive yourself for everything in a chain of consciousness. Forgive yourself for whatever arises, forgive yourself for the things you know & the things you don't know, forgive yourself for not knowing better, for thinking you could know better. What happens is it smooths away all the places where attacks and projections can hook into. And I find in a short while I begin to feel human and have compassion for myself for being human. I first learnt this as a means for protecting myself from psychic attack. It also works fabulous as a cure for insomnia. Also, it is useful to note that we think of attacks as coming from outside yourself, when really, we are more often the source. The other tools and skills work for self-attacks as well.

Sometimes it can seem heroic or glamorous to defeat or fight back, especially when it's perceived to be a psychic attack or entity, but it's often wiser to not feed the energy. Like the Akito principal of meeting it and helping it through. Projections and attacks work by hanging on hooks, the places where there is a bit of truth, even though minuscule. By forgiving yourself you let go of the hooks so there is nothing to attach to.

I also do meta for the person I am having trouble with. I tend to do most the metas for the people I find the most difficulty with. A Meta is like a Buddhist blessing. The one I use is a Buddhist Meta I added a little to. It's:

May you be happy
May you be peaceful
May you be healthy
May you be filled with love
May you follow your joy (I added this line)

The truth is if the person I am struggling with was all these things we wouldn't have a problem, so it seems a good thing. Before long I am in a bigger framework and at peace.


Remembering

There is ego and there is soul. The ego is much more easily bruised. I try and recover to soul and bigger places whenever possible. The ego likes to rant. I find even if the ego is absolutely right about what is happening, it's just wasting energy to get caught up. I often have a deeper understanding if I can be conscious enough to remember it. An intention I am working for, a realization I am heading this way and this struggle is taking me off the path, a way of reframing the drama. Jewelry, nail polish, etc. can be ways of remembering yourself, of reminding yourself of your intention- or the need to protect yourself. (They can also be used as a barrier, like the subtle flower above or evil eye symbols).


Barrier

Placing a barrier between yourself and the attack, or thing you are needing protection from is another method. Creating a shield within your aura is one method. Physical methods include using a poppet/ doll to keep the attack away from your person- or setting up an actual mirror to reflect it. I have two favorite methods. One is cutting a potato in half and leaving it out to absorb any negativity. The other thing I like to do is simply hold my athame and let it cut away any negativity. I find I don't even need to think about it, I can even watch tv, and after a while begin to feel better.


Releasing & Finding Your Way Back

Release the residue as soon as you are able when you have absorbed something. Animals instinctively physically shake it off. Physical activity works well. We walk things off. Cleansing, bathing works well, especially with a scent or salt that you associate with safety, healing, resilience. I find cleaning my home can bring me back after hard times. I call it Cinderella's my way back.


* I want to acknowledge Patricia Novotny who taught me several of the tools here. I may have adapted them over time but the roots are hers. I learned Placing a flower between, self-forgiveness, and claiming the space from her.